Saturday, May 2, 2009

waiting it out.


one of my ten resolutions for 2009 was "be patient -- with yourself and with others". i'm the most impatient person ever, and it's a constant challenge to remind myself that good things do actually come to those who wait. the saying always confused me; who wants to just wait around for good things to happen? isn't life about being active, and determined, and making things happen for yourself? it's always been hard for me to grasp the idea that it may take a little (or a long) while longer for the things i want in life to show themselves. some of my biggest mistakes were made because i was trying to force something that probably would have worked out, had i not been so impatient. i get in my own way a lot; i either push too hard to make things happen, and they subsequently fall apart, or i don't even bother trying because i just plain don't want to wait for the results. it's proving pretty detrimental.

martin luther king, jr. said that faith is taking the first step, even when you can't see the whole staircase. it makes sense to me because i think you have to have a certain level of faith and hope to stay patient, especially when things are looking pretty bleak. nobody is perfect -- except for my friend alana, she's pretty close -- and reminding myself of that fact has already worked wonders. i can't be so hard on myself when things don't work out -- some things work, some things don't, and i will drive myself crazy if i continue to freak out every time things don't go my way. i have to make the conscious decision to be patient, and not get stressed about things that i feel aren't happening "fast enough". it's hard, but i do think that patience is rewarded, and i need all the rewards i can get.

mood music: lykke li - time flies

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